Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Dad's Death and Deciding Not to Run.

CAPITOL PEAKS 50 MILES

I signed up, and I planned to  go.  My FIRST 50 miler !!
I know I did the training. Threw in a couple of 3.5-4 hr doubles, and two training 50Kms. Studied the maps, even packed my bag.
But,
Then 'life' happened. Or should I say death- my father passed away suddenly a couple of weeks ago and I just got back from his funeral.  4-500 people showed up !  (pic of line up after arena full on the right-->)
 he was a big volunteer in a small community. Countless years for Jr hockey, and even had a world professional bullriding event (that he organized locally) dedicated to his name! I love him dearly and am still processing what just happened.

Needless to say, the last week had too few miles, too many tears, too many buffets, and too many glasses of wine.  Nice prep for a 50 miler  wouldn't you say?
On the positive side,  preparing for this run was a nice distraction but   I was hoping it would be  some kind of healing/ pilgrammage/ or life answer from this event.  
However , I was lacking my key ingredients  for my runs; "Fun" and 'Drive". Yup, no sense of 'ha ha' here, and  definately exhausted. Every day is kind of a haze.   I am expecting this 'frump'  is just a part of my 'stages of loss' and I will deal with it and move on. I hope.

Luckily there are a lot of races out there, so I will eventually get back on that horse and charge forward!

I end with an inspiring quote I came across today:

"SOMEBODY OUGHT TO TELL US , RIGHT AT THE START OF OUR LIVES, THAT WE ARE DYING. THEN WE MIGHT LIVE OUR LIFE TO THE LIMIT EVERY MINUTE OF EVERY DAY. DO IT, I SAY, WHATEVER YOU WANT TO DO, DO IT NOW! "
-- MICHAEL LANDON  (died age 54 of pancreatic cancer)


Heather

4 comments:

kelly said...

What can I say about this post? I am so sorry for the loss of your Dad. My Dad died 20 years ago and I still grieve his death daily. Hang in there, Heather. It does get better. He will get you through your first 50 miler, just you watch. My thoughts are with you. :(

HEATHERRUNS said...

Thank you Kelly ! I saw your great post on your dad too. Lots of alcoholism in my family, so it really 'hit home'. I appreciate you taking the time to respond !
Keep up your great posts and remember, I'm a Physio... so if you have any questions do not hesitate to ask!

Stacey (aka UltraPrincess) said...

I am so sorry to hear about your loss..... can't imagine what you're going through.

Keep strong.
xo

Stacey (aka UltraPrincess) said...

I am so sorry to hear about your loss..... can't imagine what you're going through.

Keep strong.
xo